Naked and Unashamed
"How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful.."
Song of Solomon 4:1
So, I am going to lay it out there and be honest. My heart is racing. I might be blushing tonight as I write about this topic, but I think it's too important to skip over. Have you ever read the book of the Bible, Song of Solomon? If you have, you know why I am blushing. Gulp. If you haven't, I suggest you read it in its entirety as I will only be discussing chapter four.
Deep breaths. I got this.
Before Solomon takes his bride to the marriage bed, he takes time to look into her eyes (v. 1). He describes her hair as being like a "flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead" (v. 2). Ladies, can you imagine your husband comparing your hair to that of a goat? Eek. You'd probably slap him. However, she didn't slap Solomon...and I hope to get to why a few paragraphs from now.
Solomon goes on to compliment her teeth.
He does much better, in my mind, when he says, in verse 3, "Your lips are like scarlet ribbon; your mouth is lovely..." He takes time to pay attention to her temples. Seriously. How many times has anyone complimented your temples? Be honest. I can honestly say, it has never happened in my life. And I consider my husband very complimentary.
He moves on to her neck before saying...I can do this...here it is...type it already, Jen..holding my breath...."Your two breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies." Exhale. Okay, that wasn't too bad. It's the Bible, guys and gals, what can I say? (Side note: some scholars wanted to leave it out of the Bible).
When Solomon complimented "the girls," I don't think he was really saying they looked like deer. Let's hope not, because that would be weird. The whole book is filled with metaphors. Maybe he was saying that seeing them brought out the same tender feelings one might have when seeing baby deer. It is more about the feelings behind the descriptions than about the visual imagery.
There is so much we can learn about marriage from this steamy book of the Bible. Solomon and his bride looked at one another much how I envision Adam and Eve looking at one another. It was a Garden of Eden kind of love. It wasn't superficial or lustful. It was an appreciative love. They were naked and unashamed.
Some see it as a book that can be compared to the deep and intimate love God feels for his people. Because His love is so pure, so full and so unashamed. This comparison resonates with me.
However, the purpose of my writing tonight is on the marital relationship. When I read through Song of Solomon, chapter 4, I am amazed at the analogies. Thought was put in to each and every one of his poetic descriptions. He was paying attention. It wasn't just, "Hey, woman. You're hot!" His words were thoughtful and meaningful. What if we, as a spouse, began to hone in on the details of our lover and compliment him/her? Lover? Can I say that in a blog post? ha It's in the Bible, so I should be safe. What if we tell our spouse how cute her nose is when it wrinkles a certain way, or how his laugh is one of our favorite attributes. What if we made it a point to compliment from the waist up FIRST before moving on? Get my drift. If you finish chapter 4, you will see that things worked out for ole Solomon that night.
Solomon's bride was his standard of measurement. What if our standard of measurement was our spouse and not the fake and photo shopped images we see on television and in magazines? Or better yet, what authors are writing about in trashy romance novels. Our spouse should be our standard to which everything else is compared instead of comparing our spouse to what we see, or think we see in the world.
I want to encourage you tonight to look at your bride or your groom, whatever the case may be, the way Solomon looked at his bride. And make your appreciating thoughts known by verbalizing them to your spouse. Many times I forget to tell him that his eyes remind me of deep pools of comfort from which I drink until I am full. Gushing. Sorry. Just wanting to give you an example.
Picture me sitting her nervously rubbing my neck and upper chest. It's almost over.
This book is called SONG of Solomon. Perhaps he sang to her. If that's your thing, go for it. But be naked, be vulnerable, and be unashamed with your lover!
Thank you Father for giving us your love. Thank you for giving us many examples in your word of how we should honor, appreciate, and value our spouse. Thank you for allowing Song of Solomon in your word as an encouragement to couples every where that it's okay to be intimate and romantic with the one for which you united us with. We know that our marriages are set up to honor you, and our prayer is that our marriage with honor you.